The Housemaid by Freida McFadden is a book that was written.
This is a book I didn’t think I would like going into it, and it turns out I was right. Everybody else also thought I wouldn’t like it, and it should have come with a label that read, “Ryan, do not read.” Fun fact: Turns out, Freida McFadden is actually a brain surgeon by day and decided to extend her craft by giving a mass lobotomy to society with her writing.
I think, on the whole, this book is sloppy fun for people. I am glad people get enjoyment out of this, perhaps in a similar way to how I enjoy absolute pulpy trash I find in the recesses of Amazon Prime Video. The story is frustrating and drags on even though it’s technically easy to read due the simple prose, which is full of clichés and the same mind-numbing descriptors used over and over. The mystery isn’t really a mystery, more of “turns out all the characters were lying the whole time” kind of book. No tells, no hints, no nothing.
The characters are flat except for maybe the titular housemaid who has her signature Spunk©. Although, what makes her character interesting in the first chapter mostly dissipates by the 1/4th mark. Eventually, this book devolves into a revenge fantasy that involves a torture chamber??? The main character tortures and kills a guy?? A very bad guy, but like what?? It ends happily, of course, and the housemaid becomes a vigilante who will go on to save housewives in danger. Yippie! It’s kind of fun how stupid it is.
At the very least, it gave me a newfound appreciation for more competent mystery novels, even ones I have previously disparaged. See guys, I am growing! You may be asking yourself, “Ryan, why did you read a book that you knew you would hate?” The answer, dear reader, is friendship. When my friends ask me to jump, I say, “How high?” When my friends ask me to read a book with them, I say, “How long? Oh, 300ish pages? That’s not too bad.”
I am sure this is a better movie than a book, which was also apparently admitted by the author. Maybe, in 20 years, when I find it in the bowels of Amazon Prime Video (who also by this point will own my house, television, and parts of my brain), I will like this story.
1/5